Why Jessica Simpson Shouldn't Take John Mayer Back Again

Way back in March 2006, I speculated extensively on whom, astrologically speaking, then-newly-single Jessica Simpson should get into a relationship with, and came up with a pretty specific zone of the zodiac for her to use as her dating pool:

I like the idea of her dating someone with his Sun betweeen 16-23° Libra, which would square her Sun (challenging her, which I think Jess needs right now) but also trine her Moon/Venus, creating an easy emotional bond. {Full story}

Well, as we all now know, she took up with sensitive Libra singer-songwriter John Mayer, whose Sun is at -- I tell you, I don't make this stuff up, people -- 22° or 23° Libra, depending on his exact birth time. See John Mayer's birth chart (Astrotheme, no birth time) But their on-off relationship has been characterized by stereotypical Libran oscillation; it seems John is afflicted with the ambivalence about commitment that often befalls natives of this Sun sign, and keeps breaking up and making up with Jess. So, although my original prediction (or rather, recommendation) came to pass, it didn't exactly work out happily.

The irony is that a large part of my analysis of who Jess should date was predicated on the guess that Jess--whose birth time I did not then know -- had a Gemini Moon, which would vibe with an airy Libra. Instead, it turns out -- thanks to data graciously provided by the AstroTwins, to whom I am deeply indepted and most grateful for the scoop -- that Jessica's Moon is in watery Cancer. (Seriously, seeing her in the kitchen, I never would have guessed that. You can't win 'em all, people.) See Jessica Simpson's birth chart (Exclusive to CelebAstroBlogy.com)

With her Sun, Moon and Mercury in Cancer, and Scorpio, also a water sign, on the Ascendant (conjunct her ex-husband Nick Lachey's Scorpio Sun, by the by), Jessica is very emotionally driven. Like John, she has a Sun-Mercury conjunction and therefore a tendency to be all up in her own head -- but where his Libra conjunction overthinks, her Cancer conjunction gets oversensitive. When they argue, she finds him cold and unemotional while he finds her hysterical.

Jessica's Venus in Gemini does vibe romantically with John's Sagittarius Moon, but ultimately the freewheeling wanderer spirit of that Sag Moon is unsatisfying and unavailable for her security-oriented Cancer Sun-Moon. As a homebody Cancer, Jessica may have grown tired of following her rocker beau on tour and longed to settle down again.

Further, John's Venus at 29° Virgo -- though it forms an out-of-sign conjunction with her Mars in Libra that could stir up passionate sparks -- has a sort of neurotic quality, a tendency to nitpick and criticize his partners (one wonders why Jessica changed her hair color and dress style while she was with him).

And while the square between their Suns may have enabled the couple to challenge each other, as I anticipated in my original post on Jess' hypothetical Libra hookup, the challenge was too great. With the Mercury square as well as the Sun square, their perspectives are at odds. These two always seemed like an awkward fit, and while they may have repeatedly broken up and made up, ultimately their horoscopes do not show the kind of synastry that would suggest a lasting long-term union.

So, what sign -- or which star -- do you think Jess should date next? I'd love to hear your comments!

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