You
know how they did that study about how looking at pictures of cute things like
kittens and baby pandas releases
endorphins, the same as having sex or doing drugs? Well, I would like to
see some serious scientific funding given out to study the phenomenon of endorphin
release while discussing Project Runway. I have yet to meet anyone whose
eyes do not light up at the mention of this beyond-compelling phenomenon. You
start talking about this show and suddenly everyone from my yoga instructor
to my cancer-scientist uncle turns into a freakin' WWD editor. Some people,
who shall not be named, even host weekly screenings and go to such preposterous
homage lengths as to prepare pizzas conceptually representing each of the four
finalists. (Okay, whatever, I'm not ashamed! Uli was bratwurst, pineapple
and cilantro; Michael was ricotta and mozzarella with roasted garlic;
Laura was goat cheese with olives arranged in a V-neck shape and red
pepper lips; and Neck Face Jeffrey was prosciutto strips criss-crossed
into plaid topped with a skull and crossbones made out of capers. Now you see
why I haven't had time to post lately!) Seriously, PR has the power to
unite humanity. I would venture to say that if Israeli and Palestinian leaders
were to watch a season-recapping marathon together they would finally be able
to find common ground and bring their peoples together. Well, realistically,
Palestine would probably side with Jeffrey and Israel would side with Angela's
mother and it would become a whole nother can of worms that would lead to future
generations of bloodshed and enmity, but I digress. The point is, it occurred
to me that by casting charts for the four finalists and combining the endorphin-releasing
pleasure of astrology with that of Project Runway, I could just about
achieve geekgasm. On that note, let us proceed with the predictions!
Now, let me start by saying that the birth data for reality show contestants
is typically spotty, and this crew is no exception. It almost goes without saying
that there's not a birth time in the bunch. I have accurate towns of birth for
Laura (New Orleans, LA) and Michael (Nuremberg, Germany—what's with the
Teutonic vibe on this show, anyway?), but know only that Uli was born somewhere
in East Germany and Jeffrey is from... well, I don't really know where Jeffrey
came from originally. (I messaged him on Myspace asking for his birth data,
but we all know how
well that turned out last time, so I'm not holding my breath.) Obviously,
if anyone has more details, please email
me.
• Laura Bennett (born August 2, 1963, in New Orleans) is currently
getting a nice trine from Saturn to her natal Jupiter, which describes the organized,
methodical way she has gone about pursuing her dreams and goals. This aspect
doesn't jump out at me as predicting a victory so much as suggesting that Laura
could make some connections with influential industry figures (Saturn) who help
her continue pursuing her goal (Jupiter). Transiting Venus, planet of art, beauty
and material reward, in its own sign of graceful, elegant Libra, and its placement
in the contestants' charts may be an important key to how they fare in a contest
of aesthetic sensibilities. In Laura's natal chart, transiting Venus (and, more
loosely, the Sun and Mars) falls opposite Laura's natal Jupiter, which may bring
good fortune but could contrbute to a tendency to coast or take the easy road.
Laura may be so caught up in basking in the moment that she starts to rest on
her laurels before they have been awarded.
• Jeffrey Sebelia (born May 30, 1970, location unknown) is, according
to the official PR site, under the mistaken
impression that he is a Taurus, when in fact he is a Gemini. Now, it would
be almost too easy to point out that Geminis are known for being two-faced and
for double-talk, so ... oh, wait, I said almost, so yeah, let's go there.
Dude is a snake!!! I'm guessing there's some Scorpio in that chart (his Ascendant,
perhaps?), since he has that Gemini-Scorpio tendency to go for the verbal jugular
(we all agree that Angela's mom was even whinier and frumpier than Angela and
therefore deserved some level of peremptory dismissiveness, but DAMN, he knew
exactly what buttons to push to undermine both of them!). Oops, was I extrapolating?
Back to the chart. Ahem. Anyway. Since I don't even have a birthplace confirmed,
this reading will necessarily be rudimentary; for all I know, Jupiter could
be sitting smack on that hypothetical Scorpio Ascendant, handing him the victory
on a plaid, zippered, suspiciously-well-topstitched silver platter. But barring
such inadmissible speculation, the best aspects I see are the transiting Sun
and Mars crossing over his natal Jupiter, with transiting Venus bringing up
the rear. This is definitely a lucky, positive configuration, but it feels a
little short-lived; since it will blow over in a matter of a few days, it seems
unlikely that it would augur him being thrust into the spotlight in a life-changing
way. Then again, has anyone heard from either of the previous winners since
their moments of respective triumph? So, see, that one could really go either
way.
• Uli Hertzner (born April 23, 1971, East Germany, town unknown)
is my girl, considering I never met a comfortable, low-cut print dress I didn't
like. And since I and my fellow cluttered-aesthetic-loving Taurean MQ are squarely
Team Uli, I was about delighted to find out that she is ONE OF US! ONE OF US!
ULI! ULI! ULI! Ahem... must maintain objectivity... anyhoo... I actually wish
fervently that I had a star to hitch my bias wagon to, but the stars, sadly,
are not aligned for my beloved Uli. There are challenges and obstacles ahead
for her with both Saturn and Mars squaring their natal positions, and Chiron
squaring her Sun. The Saturn square may mean a reevaluation of her methods and
goals as a designer, perhaps prompted by the haters who find anything whatsoever
wrong with an endless series of sexy, comfy print dresses, which frankly boggles
my mind. Uli may literally have to go back to the drawing board (wait, do fashion
designers actually use drawing boards? If not, please report
me) and take a hard look at her limitations—though, if she uses this
energy constructively, she can build up her body of work from a creative foundation
that is that much stronger for her having done this work on herself. Still,
from a personal perspective, I am compelled to add: ULI! ULI! ULI!
• Michael Knight (born April 11, 1978, Nuremberg, Germany) is,
despite my personal preference for Uli's taste, the designer universally agreed
by all reasonable people to have the widest range of style and sensibility.
And damned if he doesn't know how to flatter a woman's body. Okay, there I go
extrapolating again.... Michael, though, has the planetary goods to back up
his skillz. He is currently experiencing an extremely significant transit: his
first Saturn return, marking the shift into adulthood and maturity. The Saturn
return can be marked by hard life lessons or by rewards for hard work, depending
on how a person has conducted his or her life up until that point. This could
be a time of real recognition for Michael. Meanwhile, transiting Saturn is also
activating his natal Saturn's grand trine with his Sun (ego) and Neptune (dreams
and fantasies), again suggesting the possibility of his dreams being made manifest.
That fashion-friendly Venus in Libra, moreover, is opposing Michael's Sun, which
could bring him some ego gratification. (P.S. Robert Hand says to be careful
of any relationship formed under a Venus-opposite-Sun transit, so Michael, be
wary of Brandy!)
Winner: Michael. I know everyone who has unsportsmanlikely peeked at
his collection thinks it's totally disappointing, but dude, that Saturn return
activating his grand trine is no joke.
Find more web pages about:
Project Runway ~ Laura Bennett ~ Uli Herzner ~ Michael Knight ~ Jeffrey Sebelia ~
Astrology
~ Celebs
~ Celebrity
~ Celebrities
Salutations,
gentle readers! Many of you have already checked out CelebAstroBlogy's Astrology
101 area, which launched this summer, where you can learn all about
sun sign personality traits,
zodiac sign archetypes, planets,
houses, aspects
and more. And I thank you for that. 
