Paula Abdul Is Acting Cuckoo Crazy

While I do not personally enjoy American Idol, I do love a good celebrity meltdown. Hence I am most intrigued by Paula Abdul's apparent descent into incoherence on the show, which has spawned rumors that she is on drugs and about to be fired. [Source (one of many, this report was the funniest]

With the transiting Jupiter in Scorpio-Neptune in Aquarius square forming a T-square with her Mars in Taurus, Paula may be a bit, shall we say, woozy or off kilter. Jupiter-Neptune can invite self-medication and/or overindulgence. And she is heading for a potentially turbulent, chaotic time as Pluto in Sagittarius draws closer to the opposition to her Gemini Sun and trines her natal Uranus in Leo. See Paula Abdul's astrological chart (Astrotheme)

Paula definitely needs to watch herself right now if she doesn't want to get fired from her Idol gig. In his indispensable book Planets in Transit, Robert Hand says of the Pluto opposite Sun transit: "One dangerous aspect of this transit is that it may trigger off a conflict with persons in authority over you.... These people can do you more harm than most, and you should be very careful." (Hand also advises care for one's body, warning of a possible "health breakdown" during this transit.)

This Pluto-Sun opposition can bring the potential to reinvent one's life and make a fresh start, and with Pluto also trining her Uranus, it seems even more likely that Paula could be making a break from her present situation. There's even more pressure on her with Saturn on her Venus, stalling her love life, and Chiron on her Uranus unexpectedly opening old wounds. With the Jupiter-Neptune square, Paula could turn to escapist behavior such as, say, I don't know, addiction to pills?

And all these themes are mirrored in Paula's progressed chart (showing where she has evolved to as a person), with the Moon in Virgo conjuncting Pluto as well as Uranus in Leo, while Pluto opposes Chiron-Jupiter in Neptune-ruled Pisces. Scorpio, ruled by Pluto, is on the Ascendant.

Pluto has great transformative potential if you choose to embrace change and cast off what isn't working in your life. But I have a feeling that this might be tough for Paula. Gemini is a mutable sign and generally tends to be comfortable with a state of flux, but with Paula's Capricorn Moon right on the 4th house cusp, plus Mars in slow-and-steady Taurus, she has a strong need for security, routine and remaining in her comfort zone. With Saturn conjunct the South Node, Paula may have a tendency to fall back into a rut when she is being challenged to learn a cosmic lesson. With Jupiter conjunct Chiron, it is difficult to maintain optimism; good fortune always seems to come tinged with bitter disappointment. When it comes to turning crisis into opportunity, Paula's first instinct might be to crawl into bed and pop a Xanax or seven. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

Now, I'm not saying that my part-Syrian sistah can't get her bearings on this shaky ground. With that Capricorn Moon, she has the ability to establish her own sense of structure even in the face of chaos all around her. But in order to manifest this potential, Paula needs to work to overcome a tendency toward self-pity and wallowing in drama. Pluto's conjunction to her Sun will not be exact until early 2007 (since Pluto goes retrograde for almost half the year, it doesn't move very far), so if she doesn't deal with her authority issues now she's likely to again come into conflict with the American Idol powers that be. If she doesn't want to be fired -- or to endanger her health -- Paula needs to tap into her own inner source of power and acting centered and in control.

In early July 2006, when Saturn opposes its natal position, Paula may be feeling like she is at her lowest point and the world is against her, but this is precisely the time when she needs to get it together, pull herself up by the bootstraps and start laying the foundation for the kind of life she wants to live. This halfway point in the Saturn cycle is critical; a person who buries her head in the sand now is going to be treated to a world of hurt 14 years later, when the next Saturn return rolls around. Paula needs to stop hiding from or self-medicating her issues and start doing some hard work on herself.

Luckily for her, there may be one way to make this process a bit easier: With her Venus in Leo in the 10th, she could really use an older, or at least secure, successful and established, man to treat her like a queen. (Yeah, I know, couldn't we all.) If Paula is fortunate enough to find a partner who can give her father-figure-like support in a non-creepy-Svengali way, while still giving her the freedom to find her own way and explore who she is, the sense of security she'll get from such a relationship could go a long way toward giving her the confidence she needs to get right with herself.

I'll be pulling for Paula, although I'll also be amused if she continues to act erratic and incoherent. Really, for me it's a win-win.