Moses Martin, Welcome to the World!

Mazel tov and all that good stuff to mama Gwyneth Paltrow, papa Chris Martin and big sister Apple (at right with Gwyn) on the birth of young Moses Martin, which, according to the paparazzi-party-pooping pair's reps, took place "this weekend." [Source] However, I must protest the dearth of birth data. This announcement is vaguer than Ricky Martin when discussing his sexuality. Um, is there anything more frustrating for an astrologer than a birth announcement with a two-to-three-day window? I mean, we live for exact birth data like celeb photographers live for first-baby-photo exclusives and drunken-ingenue nipple slips. "Weekend" could mean any time from Friday to Sunday (April 7–9), giving Moses either a Leo Moon or a Virgo Moon. Among other things, the Moon depicts how the person views his or her mother. With these two signs, Moses would perceive his momma either as a full-of-herself supastah or a controlling, neurotic macrobiotic, so that could really go either way.*

At the very least, we can say that a little Aries will vibe nicely with a Libra mom like Gwyneth (see Gwyneth Paltrow's birth chart; Astrotheme). His Venus conjuncts her Ascendant, fostering an empathic connection between them. With his Sun opposite her Uranus, his Uranus on her Ascaendant, and his Mars in Gemini on her Saturn, Moses will be constantly surprising his mom and she will have to keep a watchful eye on him as he's always running around getting into trouble. Once this kid reaches the terrible twos, Gwynnie won't need Ashtanga yoga to stay fit; she'll be too busy chasing after him.

Likewise, Moses' Uranus is right on dad Chris's Sun (see Chris Martin's birth chart; Astrotheme), signifying that he will bring a lot of unpredictable behavior and shake-ups into his father's life. Even Apple, who has a nice Venus-Mars bond with her baby brother, also has a Uranian connection with Moses, with his Venus on her Uranus (see Apple Martin's birth chart; Astrotheme). This kid is definitely going to turn this family on its ear. I'm starting to think Moses might turn out to be a little hyperactive and ADHDy, which would be kinda ironic considering Gwyneth would probably sooner give her children crystal meth than let them eat white sugar. All's I'm saying is, a few years from now, I would not be surprised to see the Paltrow-Martins tearing their collective hair out on "Celebrity Nanny 911."

That's about as much insight I can give working with aspects from the slower-moving planets, which would be in effect throughout the weekend. The P-Ms are bound to cough up a date and time sooner or later, and when they do, stay tuned for an update!*

*UPDATE: Moses' birth date and time have been revealed. Check out his birth chart and the analysis.