Holy Shizuka!

Well, this is why my motto is "Everything happens for a reason, and sometimes the reason is that you're a dumbass." I just KNEW I should've looked up that pesky meddling Japanese skater Shizuka Arakawa's chart, but dammit, who had any idea that there were countries besides the U.S. and Russia competing in the Olympics? Seriously, did anyone else get that memo?

Anyway, even if I had included Shizuka in my ladies' figure skating predictions, I honestly don't know that I would have singled her out to beat Sasha and Irina to the gold. Shizuka was born December 29, 1981 in Tokyo, Japan [Source: NBC Olympics], giving her a Capricorn Sun-Mercury and probably (though not definitely, as no birth time is given) an Aquarius Moon. At the time of her medalicious free skate, Jupiter was sextiling her Mercury and Saturn (ruler of her Capricorn Sun-Mercury) was sextiling her Mars, both creating windows of opportunity for her to pursue success with a stepped-up level of drive and confidence. But frankly, these aren't such big-deal aspects. Perhaps when it comes to an Olympic event in which an off-kilter second can undermine years of training, it makes sense to look at more fleeting, transient aspects. At the time when the ladies' free skate was held on Feb. 23, the Moon in Capricorn was passing over Shizuka's Sun-Mercury. Just as Sasha Cohen won the short program while the Moon was on her Sagittarius Sun, this same aspect provided Shizuka her moment to shine. Now, let us never speak of this crushing disappointment again.