TomKat's Scorpio Marriage: Manipulation Much?

And so it is done. Following a reported recitation of Scientology vows as misgoynistic as they are random, TomKat is one.

Astrologically speaking, however, I am still waiting for the other (flat) shoe to drop. A bajillion inane reports about the "fairytale" wedding of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes in Bracciano, Italy, have so far failed to note or even estimate the time of the ceremony. (Please, gentle readers, email me if you come across an exception.) I will keep looking; in the meantime, I have deduced that the marriage must have been made official sometime after 4:20 PM, judging from a report that has Tom helicoptering in to the ceremony at 4 PM {Source} and others reporting it was 20 minutes long (ugh, I looked through so many I can't find one to source right now). That said, my hunch is that the ceremony that un-love-childed Suri was most likely later in the day, considering repeated references to evening and nightfall in wedding reports like this one.

Can this limited narrowing-down tell us anything about the wedding chart? Well, it settles one issue I raised when TomKat originally set a wedding date: The timeframe places the Moon in Scorpio along with a whopping four other planets, including the Sun, which describes the core character of the marriage. Oh, noooo, there are no dynamics of control, manipulation, deception, contractual obligation or glomming onto someone else's financial status involved here.

One interesting point of note is that the marriage was "officialized" (read: "actually happened") in L.A. prior to the couple's Italian trip. {Source} So I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the good people at TMZ come through with the documents legalizing the union, since this down-low deal might well shed high-wattage light on this mysterious Scorpionic marriage. Stay tuned, and again, please pass along any info on the ceremony (or City Hall visit) you may come across.

Related: • TomKat Sets a Wedding Date (11/11/06) • Birthday Predictions for Tom Cruise: Wedding On or Off? (7/4/06) • Does Suri Cruise Really Exist? (6/22/06) • Just How Screwed Up Will Suri Cruise Be? (4/21/06) • Whither TomKat? (2/17/06) • No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

Find more web pages about: Tom Cruise ~ Katie Holmes ~ Suri Cruise ~ Astrology ~ Celebs ~ Celebrity ~ Celebrities

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TomKat Sets a Wedding Date

At last the bizarro blessed union of TomKat is set to become legal! The creepy cute couple has set a date to wed, on November 18 in Italy. {Source} While I have certainly doubted whether Tom Cruise would ever make an honest woman of Katie Holmes, I am extremely intrigued to check out the chart for this surreal joyful event.

Mind you, without an exact time and location, it is possible to characterize a wedding chart only in very broad strokes. It goes without saying that this post is a preliminary one that will be followed up once TomKat releases more details about the ceremony, after and possibly even before the fact. But even with just a date to go from, there are some quite interesting aspects hinting at the future dynamic of this marriage.

I cast a chart for November 18, 2006 in Rome, Italy (based on reports, denied by the couple, that they may wed in a castle near Rome {Source}; anyway, the exact coordinates don't make a vital diff without a time). On this date, the Sun is in late Scorpio, and depending on the time of the marriage, the Moon could either be in Libra, or in Scorpio as well.

The Sun/Jupiter conjunction in Scorpio in the wedding chart forms an out-of-sign conjunction with Venus in Sagittarius, which actually sounds like a pretty sweet configuration for a wedding chart, with a joyful, loving emphasis on uniting and growing together. But this conjunction squares Saturn, which brings in intimations of control or repression. There is a paternal, restrictive aspect to Saturn; astrologers selecting an auspicious wedding chart will typically seek to neutralize its influence as much as possible. Here, its shadow looms rather large. Suri is not the only one in the household with a strong father figure.

Saturn is also trine Pluto, an aspect that has been and will continue to be in effect for months between the two slow-moving planets. Ruler of the four Scorpio planets in the chart, Pluto sets a tone of intensity. There are definitely unseen depths to this marriage. The Saturn-Pluto trine could suggest someone pulling the strings from behind the stage.

Also notable in the wedding chart: Mercury (and Mars, loosely) is trine Uranus. Both Mercury and Uranus are stationary direct, with the former having just completed its retrograde period and the latter wrapping it up. Information is flowing through the channels of communication, but there are a lot of mixed signals, unexpected leaks and dropped calls. For a couple that has alternately courted and shunned media attention, this aspect is interesting. As a married couple, they may seek to flow information out to the public only to find that they have unwittingly opened the floodgates and cannot control what comes pouring out.

Again, the picture will come into clearer focus after the ceremony, the time of which will, hopefully, be released so we can look at the exact wedding chart. A Scorpio Moon could be very revealing in terms of the aspect of secrecy, if that's not completely contradictory. Anyway, stay tuned!

Related:
• Birthday Predictions for Tom Cruise: Wedding On or Off? (7/4/06)
• Does Suri Cruise Really Exist? (6/22/06)
• Just How Screwed Up Will Suri Cruise Be? (4/21/06)
• Whither TomKat? (2/17/06)
• No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

Find more web pages about: Tom Cruise ~ Katie Holmes ~ Suri Cruise ~ Astrology ~ Celebs ~ Celebrity ~ Celebrities

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Does Suri Cruise Exist? The Plot Thickens

The saga of so-called Suri Cruise just keeps getting weirder and weirder. It's a conspiracy theorist's delight! The vigilant folks at TMZ have obtained a birth certificate for Suri and, in a fitting discovery for a Mercury retrograde, revealed that there was a mysterious delay in filing it—plus the signature was by a "friend" rather than either Tom or Katie. Weird! {Source}

Perhaps even more importantly for our purposes, this birth certificate, as a couple of sharp-eyed readers were kind enough to point out to me, lists a birth time for Suri of 3:26 AM. {Source} This means, as reader L. noted, that Neptune's conjunction to the Ascendant, which, as I have discussed, describes the veil of deception surrounding her birth, now comes from the 12th house rather than the 1st house. ~ See Suri Cruise's birth chart (Exclusive to CelebAstroBlogy ~ UPDATED 7/15/06 with revised birth time)

With this corrected birth time, the Neptune-Ascendant conjunction is actually a couple of degrees tighter, and coming from the 12th house, it describes the mystery surrounding Suri perhaps even more fittingly. The secretive 12th house symbolizes the dissolution of the self into nebulousness and mystery. After living in the media glare (Neptune in Aquarius) prior to her birth (Ascendant), Suri seemed to simply fade away into the ether.

The 12th house is also associated with institutions of confinement, like hospitals and prisons, and Suri (if indeed she exists) would certainly seem to have been quarantined or sequestered from the world. (Could she perhaps have been born with some condition that Scientology doesn't believe in treating?!)

Another interesting feature of the adjusted birth time is that Venus and Uranus in Pisces are now intercepted in the 1st house. Planets in an intercepted sign are stifled, with no natural outlet for their energy. The Venus-Uranus conjunction, which is extremely tight, suggests unconventional relationships. With the interception, Suri (if she exists at all) may feel isolated and alienated, unable to form relationships or made to feel like a freak if she expresses affection. Or this placement could be an indication, again, that Suri exists in some sort of bizarro fantasy world beyond the reach of other humans.

This issue is surfacing again now as Neptune retrogrades over its position in Suri's natal chart. Once Neptune turns direct, it will make another pass over its natal position on Feb. 8, 2007 and continue to hover around Suri's Ascendant before crossing it in February 2008. We might have to wait another year and a half before seeing this child, or learning the truth about her!

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Related: • Poll Results: Why Are There No Photos of Suri? (7/11/06) • Does Suri Cruise Really Exist? (6/22/06) • Just How Screwed Up Will Suri Cruise Be? (4/21/06) • TomKitten Is an Aries! (4/18/06) • TomKitten = KittyTaurus? (4/13/06) • Whither TomKat? (2/17/06) • No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

Find more web pages about: Suri Cruise ~ Astrology ~ Celebs ~ Celebrity ~ Celebrities

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Does Suri Cruise Really Exist?

When I first analyzed Suri Cruise's birth horoscope {See Suri Cruise's birth chart ~ Exclusive to Celeb AstroBlogy} back in April, I noted the presence of Neptune on her Ascendant* and observed:

Suri has Aquarius, sign of the public and mass communication (including the Internet) rising.* The rising sign, or Ascendant, describes a person's outer appearance or the face they project to the world, as well as the birth and start of life. With Neptune, the planet of fantasy and illusion, in Aquarius (again, the sign of mass communication) conjuncting the Ascendant,* there is a veil of mystery or deception cloaking the circumstances of Suri's birth and true identity.... (Perhaps incidentally, Neptune is often prominent in the birth charts of people who are adopted.) {Source}

Well, folks, that was two months ago, and so far Suri has projected no face at all to the world. In the past few weeks, Kingston Rossdale has taken up tennis, Shiloh Jolie-Pitt has modeled for magazine covers and even friggin' Mira Sorvino's D-list baby has made his appearance. Yet the spawn of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes has made nary a peep, negotiated no photo rights deals, nor even emerged as a mass of swaddling blankets. The nebulous Neptune-Ascendant aspect seems more apt by the day. At this point people are starting to wonder: Does Suri really exist? Are the conspiracy theories about Katie's pregnancy being a sham actually true?

There certainly is a cloud around Suri's true nature in her birth chart, and suggestions of her identity being ephemeral or intangible. In addition to Neptune in Aquarius on the Ascendant, Suri also has Venus conjunct unpredictable Uranus in Neptune-ruled Pisces in her 1st house.* When two planets are in the sign the other rules, as Uranus and Neptune are in Suri's chart (and in effect in the heavens from 2003–2008) they are said to be in "mutual reception,", vibing with and strengthening each other. Obviously Aquarius (the public, the media, mass communication) and Pisces (deception, delusion, fantasy) are interwoven in Suri's chart, if indeed she exists. "Suri" may actually be short for "surreal."

Venus conjunct Uranus hints at something very unconventional and unexpected about the relationships in her life, particularly with women. The Moon, representing emotions and the mother, is conjunct secretive Pluto, perhaps echoing this theme. Could Suri herself be the secret, the unexpected female, in the sense of being nonexistent, or being a baby-for-hire that her parents are now scrambling to obtain and reveal to the world?

Tom Cruise's own horoscope may hold some hints. Tom also has Neptune prominent in his chart, as it squares his Saturn, trines (and rules) his Jupiter-Chiron, inconjuncts his Sun and sextiles his Pluto. See Tom Cruise's birth chart (Astrotheme)

Right now, transiting Jupiter is conjuncting Tom's natal Neptune, while being squared by the transiting Mars-Saturn conjunction on his Leo Moon. The element of Neptune-ruled deception is taking up more and more of his life, but he is feeling a lot of emotional pressure to express how he really feels. He may be locked into a certain M.O. that he is now bursting to break free from.

Meanwhile, Uranus has just passed Tom's Jupiter-Chiron in Neptune-ruled Pisces and is about to retrograde back over them, which could augur the sudden exposure of a deep, dark, painful secret...some skeleton in Tom's *cough* closet. A revelation could come in early September, when Uranus touches Tom's Jupiter, or around November 20 when Uranus stations right on Tom's Chiron. A final window for an "I am what I am" epiphany comes in late January 2007, when direct Uranus makes its last pass over Tom's Jupiter.

So, as with the so-called "moon" "landing," we may never know for sure whether Suri's birth was a purely Hollywood-concocted event. But it does seem like cracks are showing in the facade of the Neptunian world of illusion Tom has created around himself. Perhaps Katie will build up a tolerance to the horse tranquilizers and appetite suppressants they've been pumping her full of, and finally crack under the pressure of living the lie. When Neptune is involved, we can always dream....

*Update: Suri's birth certificate is now on file! Find out how this changes her chart.

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Related:
• Just How Screwed Up Will Suri Cruise Be? (4/21/06)
• TomKitten Is an Aries! (4/18/06)
• TomKitten = KittyTaurus? (4/13/06)
• Whither TomKat? (2/17/06)
• No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

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Just How Screwed Up Will Suri Cruise Be?

Huzzah, a birth time for the TomKitten! Thanks to Senior Research Chief Karen for tipping me off to newborn Suri Cruise's 3 AM birth time [Source]. At long last (okay, it took, like, a day) I can analyze Suri's complete chart. Here is Suri Cruise's birth chart. Interestingly, there are some features of Suri's chart that hint at the rumors surrounding her conception and Katie Holmes' much-questioned pregnancy (or lack thereof).

Suri has Aquarius, sign of the public and mass communication (including the Internet) rising. The rising sign, or Ascendant, describes a person's outer appearance or the face they project to the world, as well as the birth and start of life. With Neptune, the planet of fantasy and illusion, in Aquarius (again, the sign of mass communication) conjuncting the Ascendant, there is a veil of mystery or deception cloaking the circumstances of Suri's birth and true identity. After months of buzzing about Katie's belly, there are already rumblings online, specifically on PerezHilton.com, about this baby not really having been delivered by Katie. (Perhaps incidentally, Neptune is often prominent in the birth charts of people who are adopted.)

And with Chiron, the planetoid that is like a sore spot in the chart, conjuncting the Ascendant from the hidden 12th house of self-undoing, Suri may have some kind of secret skeleton in the closet about her identity. I've already remarked on the fact that Suri's Chiron is right on dad Tom Cruise's Saturn, representing the father principle, suggesting that Tom's parenting tactics could be a source of pain or shame for her. (See Tom Cruise's birth chart; Astrotheme) The fact that Tom's Saturn is also casting a shadow on Suri's Ascendant from the 12th house exacerbates this concern, hinting that he could be intent on controlling and limiting her identity and public image as he has often been accused of doing to Katie.

Suri's Moon, representing the emotions and the mother, is, appropriately enough, conjunct Katie's Sun in Sagittarius, so there will be a close emotional connection between them, and in all fairness this does argue in favor of Katie being the baby's actual mother. (See Katie Holmes' birth chart; Astrotheme) However, with Suri's Moon next to her Pluto, which conjuncts Katie's Sun even more closely, there will definitely be power struggles in their relationship. Sagittarius being the sign of religion, it could be Suri's rebellion against Scientology that causes a battle of the wills.

With 0° of the constantly changing mutable sign Gemini on the cusp of her 4th house, representing home and family, Suri might be moving around a lot as a kid, and have an unstable home life. This house and its opposite, the 10th, also depict the mother and father, and again, mutable signs here are a sign of receiving shaky grounding from the parents.

One more interesting feature of Suri's chart is that Venus, the planet of relationships and values, conjuncts unconventional Uranus in her 1st house. This placement could augur Suri having kinky, nontraditional relationships that are very much a part of her identity. Wouldn't it just be so cosmically just if Suri grew up to be a lesbian and married her birthday mate, Brooke Shields' daughter Grier?! (I'm assuming gay marriage will be legal by then.) I can't wait to see that on the cover of Us Weekly in 2027!

Related:
• TomKitten Is an Aries! (4/18/06)
• TomKitten = KittyTaurus? (4/13/06)
• Whither TomKat? (2/17/06)
• No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

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TomKitten Is an Aries!

Lo, it has arrived! The TomKitten is here and it is a girl! [Source] Suri Cruise arrived today, though a birth time has (curses!) not been issued.* See Suri Cruise's chart (sunrise chart, no birth time*) But I am happy to say that Katie heeded my advice and popped out the spawn of L.Ron Hubbard's frozen sperm Tom while the Sun was still in a late degree of Aries, rather than on the April 21 due date reported by OK!, also known as my birthday. As I reported, a Taurus baby would not vibe as well with Katie as a fellow fire-sign baby with the Sun in late Aries, trining Katie's Sagittarius Sun and Leo Ascendant/Moon. Plus, if Suri was born earlier in the day like the sunrise chart shown here, her Moon, representing the mother, would, fittingly, conjunct Katie's Sun.* (See Katie Holmes' birth chart; Astrotheme)

I'm happy (and a little relieved) to see that Suri and her mom will have more than an incubator-incubatee relationship. But I'm also kinda creeped out that Suri's Chiron, signifying the places we feel wounded, conjuncts Tom's Saturn, representing the father principle. (See Tom Cruise's birth chart; Astrotheme) Is Tom, who recently recalled his own father as abusive, destined to repeat a traumatic pattern with his first biological kid? As much as I personally find Tom to be loathsomely cuckoo-crazy, I would like to look on the bright side for the innocent babe's sake, so I should point out that Suri's Saturn conjuncts Tom's Moon, suggesting that her image of her father will be a nurturing one.

You better believe I'll be on the lookout for an exact birth time, and knowing the publicity-whore parents, I would expect them to issue one sometime soon.* Incidentally, Brooke Shields, whose brave candor about postpartum depression earned her a bunch of judgment from Tom, gave birth today as well. [Source] I find this coincidence rather delicious and hope to obtain birth times for both celeb offspring so I can compare the charts!

Related:
• TomKitten = KittyTaurus? (4/13/06)
• Whither TomKat? (2/17/06)
• No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

*UPDATE: Suri's birth time has been given as 3 AM [Source] and her chart has been updated accordingly. Suri is Aquarius Rising and indeed has a Moon in late Sagittarius conjuncting Katie's Sun. Complete analysis to come!

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TomKitten = KittyTaurus?

OMG! The April 17 issue of OK!'s U.S. edition reports that Katie Holmes' due date for her spawn-of-L.-Ron baby with Tom Cruise is April 21:

In recent weeks, Tom has been keeping busy not only working but also planning the birth of their little TomKitten—which OK! has learned is due to arrive on April 21—with senior members of the Church of Scientology.

This is astounding to me for two reasons: (1) Hasn't she been pregnant for, like, 17 months, with that bump changing size more often than Oprah? Haven't they been preparing with frankincense, myrrh, and silent-birth cue cards outside the Cruise Compound for weeks now? And more importantly, (2) April 21 is MY BIRTHDAY! Not only would I be terrified to share a birthday with this freak of nature, I will also be so pissed if I have to excuse myself from aging-related activities involving beer and cake to run its chart. (We Taureans love our beer and cake, let me tell you.)

Plus, I'm really not feeling the way an April 21 birth relates to Katie's chart. The baby's Sun at the very beginning of Taurus would be an awkward, uncomfortable fit with Katie's Sun, Moon and Ascendant in late degrees of fire signs (Sagittarius Sun, Leo Moon and Ascendant). I can't see her really relating to an earth-sign child. (See Katie Holmes' birth chart; Astrotheme)

Meanwhile, Tom's Moon at 1° Leo would square TomKitten's Sun, suggesting that he may try to impose his own will on the baby's identity and in some ways assume the nurturing/mothering role himself. I mean, I'm all for nontraditional gender roles in parenting, but in his case all I can say is, ay que freak show! (See Tom Cruise's birth chart; Astrotheme)

Moreover, a baby born April 21 or up to a week later would have Sun conjuncting Katie's Chiron, the planet of wounding, possibly suggesting a C-section or a very painful birth. As we all know, Scientology forbids Katie to speak or take painkillers during the birth, which is downright disturbing. I mean, most red-blooded Americans enjoy talking and taking painkillers even when they're not in labor, so this really seems cruel and unusual. I am concerned about her giving birth during this time, especially in an environment that is so utterly unsupportive of her physical and emotional needs. C'mon, Katie, pop that tot out NOW, while the Sun is still in Aries—you will have such a better relationship with a fire-sign child than with an earth sign!

Related: No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly? (1/23/06)

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Whither TomKat?

Like many a second-rate astrologer, Life & Style magazine has mastered the art of the cover-your-ass prediction, which cannot be disproved either way. See, they already told us Tom and Katie would continue to pretend to be together through the spring, so issuing a denial is a bit like saying, "No, I haven't stopped beating my wife -- I mean -- d'oh!" (Full story: CNN) Of course, time will ultimately tell if TomKat splits, just as we will eventually learn what, if anything, is actually growing inside Katie's belly. But anyway, what light can astrology shed on this rumor? Could it be that the shamtastic duo are really ready to give up the ruse -- I mean, have realized they're not right for each other?

Because TomKat is an entity unto itself, which seems to have taken on a life and personality of its own quite different from anything we saw out of Tom or Katie pre-pairing, the composite chart is a perfect format in which to analyze their relationship. A composite chart is a chart that takes two people's birth charts and basically averages them out, creating a portrait of the relationship dynamic.

In TomKat's case, the relationship dynamic appears to be a rather unstable one, with mutable signs on all four angles. Virgo is rising, with its ruler Mercury tightly conjunct from the first house. Mercury rules communication; Virgo represents control; and certainly from the beginning, this relationship has been all about announcing itself and managing the face it presents to the world (the Ascendant represents surface appearances). However, control-freak Mercury in Virgo is opposed by Mars in supersensitive Pisces in the 7th house of relationships, creating the possibility of verbal and physical outbursts in which someone might ... oh, I dunno ... jump on a couch, shake their fists in the air, and announce their love to the world? Just throwing that out there. The Sun, representing the core of the relationship, is conjunct erratic, unpredictable (and rather kinky) Uranus in Libra, the sign of partnership. Again, this is a volatile union; TomKat wants to shock the world with its love.

Worrisomely, if that is a word, relationship planet Venus, in her own sign of romantic Libra, is in an out-of-sign conjunction to controlling Pluto in Virgo. Hidden under the surface of their hearts-and-flowers romance is an intense power dynamic. There is no sense of privacy between the two individuals in the relationship with Pluto breathing down Venus's neck and asking it if it's really going to leave the house wearing that. Pluto might even ... oh, I dunno ... buy a sonogram machine so it can keep an eye on the contents of Venus' uterus. Echoing this theme of a love bound by power and control, Saturn and Neptune are tightly conjunct in secretive, power-hungry Scorpio, near the cusp of Tomkat's fourth house of home and family. Saturn rules limitations, restrictions, responsibilities and the imposition of authority. Neptune rules fantasy, deception and illusion, along with the glamour and mystique that attend celebrities. It's almost as if some iron-clad responsibility is keeping the TomKat household bound to maintaining some sort of illusion. What could this possibly mean?

If indeed there is a facade being maintained at Camp Tomkat, the question becomes one of when the cracks will start to appear. Based on transits to the TomKat composite, I'm going to guess early to mid-May. The Life & Style story came out with transiting Mercury and Uranus opposing the Tomkat Ascendant at 9° Virgo. By May, Uranus will be opposing Tomkat's Mercury, ruler of the Ascendant -- and opposing that volatile 7th-house Mars. An unexpected outburst could blow the whole thing wide open. Also at that time, retrograde Jupiter in Scorpio will be trining Mars and sextiling Mercury, offering an opportunity to grow and move on by making a clean break with the past. Transiting Pluto in Sagittarius will be squaring the Pluto in TomKat's chart, perhaps auguring a groundswell of revelations about the power dynamic in their relationship. And Saturn will be coming up on the composite Moon in Leo while Chiron opposes it, sticking a cork in TomKat's effusive outpouring of love. Since Saturn rules the father and the Moon rules the mother, this could also signal an attempt by Tom to control Katie's parenting style or impose limits on her relationship with her child. By this point, the pressures of their tightly controlled Virgo-rising relationship may have built up to a boiling point. Also, in May, Pluto will be right on Katie's free-spirited Sagittarian Sun, and she may no longer be able to squelch her own ego or suppress her true personality. Pluto has a way of finding the skeletons in people's closets and putting them on display. And come May, there could be quite a stampede out of the closet.

A note on data: I found Tom's birth time on the fantastique French astrology site Astrotheme, which I just discovered and am enchantée by. The only downside is that there is no source given for the birth time, so I can't be certain it's reliable (sometimes the data comes straight from a birth certificate; other times it's hearsay and not necessarily accurate). In any case, I have decided to use the birth time in the absence of another viable option and just take it with a grain of salt until I get confirmation.

Check out Tom's and Katie's charts on Astrotheme. (To give you a sense of how comprehensive this site is, they also have John Holmes' birth chart.) As always, please email me any confirmation or correction of birth data, or post a comment.

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No, Really, What's Up With Katie's Belly?

This disturbing photo* got me wondering about exactly whose alien fetus is or is not in Katie Holmes' womb, and whether astrology might help solve the mystery. Turns out some truly freaky-deaky transits are taking place in this budding Scientologist's chart.

In her birth chart, Katie has Venus, the relationship planet, conjuncting alternative-lifestyle Uranus in Scorpio in the 4th house of home and family, which could suggest some kinky goings-on behind closed doors, and perhaps an unconventional family or household arrangement. With Scorpio on the 4th house cusp, there could definitely be some skeletons in the closet.

At the moment, Jupiter has just entered Katie's 4th house of home and family. This can mean an addition to the family as well as a material upgrade to the home, i.e. moving in with Richy McMovieStar. As Jupiter approaches Venus, this could be a nice "aww, motherhood is expanding her capability to love" aspect. But remember, with Venus comes Uranus, and when Jupiter contacts this conjunction Katie's home life could become very volatile and unstable. Again, the Scorpio influence can mean secrecy as well as issues with power and control.

Another HUGE transit in Katie's life that hints at major life transformation, as well as secrecy and power struggles, is Pluto sitting right on top of her Sagittarius Sun (a transit that affects her all year). Pluto is the planet of transformation, and as it moves over Katie's Sun, she has certainly become an unrecognizably different person. (um, Catholic virgin to unwed pregnant Scientologist? Katie to Kate?) Katie's Sun is in the 5th house of children, so this could mean that motherhood is changing her life. But Pluto, ruler of Scorpio, also brings hints of control and manipulation. As if some powerful force were controlling the process of transformation. Katie's Sun and Jupiter are in mutual reception, meaning they vibe off each other; with both planets in fire signs, one would expect Katie to be bursting with exuberance 24/7. But Jupiter's placement in the 12th house of self-undoing damps down the enthusiasm a bit. Could this be the chart of someone who jumped at a chance for fame -- then realized it meant giving away her own power and hiding her true self? Was that a loaded question?

And as if that weren't enough secretive 12th-house action, Saturn, the planet of structure, restriction and paternalistic authority, is sitting on Katie's Jupiter, further repressing her self-expression. Gosh, it's almost as if some strong male personality were imposing his will on Katie's Sagittarian free spirit. As 2006 rolls on, Saturn will steamroll over Katie's Moon (emotions) and Ascendant (self-image), perhaps causing her to withdraw even further into herself as her fire-sign energy is snuffed out by Saturn.

Neptune -- currently transiting Katie's 6th house, which, interestingly, governs one's day-to-day responsibilities -- is in Aquarius, the sign of mass communication, directly opposite Katie's Leo Moon, which rules emotions and mothering. While Leo is the "look at me" sign, Katie's Moon is in the 12th house of the subconscious; here again we see that tension between loving the spotlight and preferring to remain hidden behind the scenes. Neptune, the planet of delusion, illusion and deception, seems to be creating an aura of mystery around Katie's status as a mother (Moon). Her pregnancy has been offered up to the masses via the media (Aquarius) as a spectacle (Leo), yet seems on some level to be a Neptunian illusion -- hence, perhaps, the morphing bump. Time will tell -- maybe -- whether an actual baby or the spawn of Xenu emerges into the world. But I'm guessing Neptune will figure PROMINENTLY in whatever-it-is's chart. Does anyone have a due date on this little beastie, anyway? Given that the photo above was taken in October, the fact that she's not RV-sized at this point raises some questions....

So, to sum up, Jupiter's entry into the 4th house and Pluto's transit of Katie's (Kate's?!) Sun could signify that she is indeed about to experience the life transformation that is giving birth to her first child. Or, with Neptune, Saturn and the 12th house in the picture, Katie's life change could be something more sinister. Clearly, further study of this matter is needed. Unless hustled into the trunk of a car by L. Ron Hubbard's "legal team," I will follow up soon with analysis of Tom Cruise's chart and how it relates to Katie. Come to think of it, I wonder if anyone has established an astrological chart for the founding of Scientology. Please e-mail me with any thoughts or data.

*UPDATE: This link, which originally yielded a photo timeline of Katie's inexplicably growing and shrinking baby bump, no longer works, and I have searched in vain for another copy of the image on the interwebs. Suffice to say, it was a disturbing pic. Also, please see Media-Darling.com's updated report on TomKitten's birth chart.

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